Who Is She? ? Comments

hi Eman; this isn't half bad...but you're making some terrible mistakes in both your spelling and punctuation... 'Do you smile when you linger her name, ' that makes absolutely no sense at all...correctly, a name may LINGER in your thoughts or a person may linger, but 'when you linger her name' is just plain b.a.d. 'That wound won't be healed by the time, and even if it did, it will only become a seam.' do you perhaps mean 'won't be healed BY time'? and by 'seam', are you implying a scar? imprecise. 'Her's and mine' should read 'hers'. this is all little stuff, but, taken together in can absolutely kill something creative and honest and new. just pay a little more attention to the small details and the larger aspects of the poem will work themselves out. i assure you. john yamrus