Watching Her Daddy Come Comments

just yet one more great poem, bravo.

keep writing girl. i see you somewhere, i mean, when all is done with down here, you could be the next yeats, or just sania great in your own right! how about that?

Good Daddy's are important in a girls life

A nice poem with meaningful deliverance. Great write my friend. Keep up

very nice. no words can describe the beauty of this poem.

excellent piece..your thoughts have a creative brilliance that shows anyone who cares to read carefully that you have wonderous promise and aptitude for poetry....never stop writing...as you grow older youll see these pieces and perhaps smile at, and understand what ive just told you.

wow, i haven`t thought that a girl of ur age could write such poem it is great.

Sania, u r truely talented.

a good write..with good deliverance..great poem... Ency Bearis

This is a very, very good poem, Nia, and overall it is well written and expressed. In your 1st line of the 1st verse the word 'stroke' should be 'stroked' her face. The rest of this verse, as well as the 2nd and 3rd verses are excellent. At the beginning of the 4th verse, the use of 'Today or tomorrow' makes the line too long or 'unbalanced' as we say; try Anyday he may come, she knew... In the next verse,2nd line, doesn't And wakes up TO a bright new day sound better? The rest of the poem is fine. A very impressive write for one as young as you are. Carl.

this is really good, a bit like one of my poems, where were you for a 14 year old, you are talented one line was a tiny bit longer to read- if that makes sense, but apart from that, you are great with writing a promising poet :) 10 for effort and opinion :)

This is an intimate family set, described with delicacy, innocence and feeling.

well done, beautiful thanks for sharing

i like this one it's sad but good, just like your other poems they're so beautiful

I really liked it but would have liked to see all of the stanzas finshed with the line 'to watch her daddy come' i thought that line was used well through out the poem. but it still worked great.9

beautiful....10 all the wayy

This piece clearly outlines the bond between father and daughter.Well done.

repetion invites a rhythm of its own and carries along the beautifu metaphors-'cherry wind'Anthony

A well-written poem. It conveys a feeling of closeness to a father and a longing to feel his presence. The longing builds with intensity. The event of her forgetting about him is a bit unexpected, but you reassure us that she hasn’t really done that - at least not intentionally. You use the word, “forget” but that doesn’t seem to be the case. It’s more like her falling under a spell - “fall asleep” and “drowse in her games”. But there is no permanent cure as is indicated in your last stanza.

Very deep and well written, good job