Undressing Poem by Phil Soar

I'm not impressed, when I get undressed
My Body has gone 'down south'
My arse is like a braille notice
Spots and pimples in excess
My waist is just that, such a waste
It's swollen that's for sure
My navel's like a deep balck hole
And my scrotums not that pure
My chest looks like well torn vest
All hairy and quite proud
By that, I mean, it should not be seen
It would make you scream out loud
So many years of food and beers
Have left there mark upon me
I feel I need some surgery
To remove the results from me
My hips take all the pressure
My ankles swell, and so
I have the gout, so I can't go out
And my movement is quite slow
When I look into the mirror
After I have washed my frame
I realise that unless I change
It will always be the same
So the next time I reflect on this
Perhaps I will change my looks
And eat instead, no more cakes or bread
Just things from slimming books