Transience Comments

I just discovered this gem of yours John; what a wonder it is, I love it. Such depth of thought and searching! Brilliantly done, and so finely crafted; please do write more. I like the note at the end: unfinished, so appropriate. Life, death, seeking, poetry, never are these finished, never truly the final say... there is always more... more... so again, please, write more! Great poem.

It still needs revision. It is still a little bit clunky, repetitive, and tedious. Plus I love the ole' romantic old English style but I am far from having mastered it. Any constructive criticism is appreciated.

Even though i like the word destined better the opposite shore your sure to reach flows better.

I may say succumb as you arrive ashore at the adjacent beach It may be too much alliteration though. What do you think? I'm still going to add a part about the uncertain possibility of life after death.

So much for immortality through fame and glory but life ends in funeral taking to grave. Wonderful poem of sadness death and funeral. Wisely drafted thought provoking poem...10