Monday, September 11, 2017

Tobias Twigg Comments

Rating: 4.0

A cold front moved across the Hudson River
Settling into the concrete streets of Hell's Kitchen
A Postal Canvas Hamper cried in its wheels
While being pushed by a scavenger collecting cardboard refuse
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Toby Twigg
COMMENTS
Jefferson Carter 11 September 2017

Toby, too many bare statements here to retain my interest. Also, a couple of usage errors harm the poem (cried IN its wheels? 'caste?) . Maybe stop writing for a while and read LOTS of good contemporary poetry in English, Donald Hall, Billy Collins, Rita Dove) ? if you have time, check out my new website: jeffersoncarterverse.com Tell me how you like it. Thanks. Yrs, JC

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