Wednesday, June 2, 2010

The Stag Comments

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As usual, with my legs in the water,
I sat chatting with the silvery river,
that mirrored the moving blue sky
like a fleeting dream
...
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Amrit Rathi
COMMENTS
Adeline Foster 12 June 2010

Interesting concept in this poem. Brings back many memories. Thanks for the comment on 'Time Heals'. Adeline

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Chitra - 07 June 2010

A very impresive beginning! A great message!

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Heather Foote 03 June 2010

Very well written I like this very much

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Margo Dove 03 June 2010

Very much educational poem. You showed correctly one of many paradoxes in life - something of beauty may the cause of our 'death' while so called an 'ugly part' may save us. Also, you mentioned a very essence of humans, their heart, but it was not developped as it could have been. Anyway, good story and point to think about.

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an exceptionally detailed and entertaining fable with a good moral and wonderful description

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Rajaram Ramachandran 02 June 2010

A good story poem presented in simple words.

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Pranab K Chakraborty 02 June 2010

The poet has fulfilled all the requirements of a writing. Title, story-content and lucid representation and at last the moral of the story also. So as a reader I simply read the neo-Rathi's fable. This much is my only....only contribution here. Regards, Apoet B

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Preetam Shetty 02 June 2010

Good one sir, I really enjoyed this.......but I am afraid you have repeated the poem twice, is it supposed to be like that....pardon my knowledge if I am wrong

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Metin Sahin 02 June 2010

Very good poem.But I advise you to read YUNUS EMRE poems.He is a legend in Turkey.Write Yunus Emre on google and read.. Go on writing...

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Dr Antony Theodore 02 June 2010

thank you for this story and great moral lesson. what God gave you is the best that you think of. do not complain about what you do not have. accept what you have and be content with your own self. God has a definite plan in creating you as you are at present. if you accept yourself as you are, then you will enjoy peace and harmony in you. you will be able to smile always. you made us think Rati Thank you very much. god bless you always.

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Les Wordsmore 02 June 2010

Great story, great rhymes, great message. Excellent poem, my friend.

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Claudia Krizay 02 June 2010

So wonderful! Such a beautiful story- and I repeat - I love the way you write poems that always tell a story with a valuable lesson to be learned. This particular poem kept me interested- because there was an element of suspense. I also loved the poem because it painted so beautifully the picture of a stag- in my opinion, the most beautiful animal in all of the wild- thanks for sharing and by the way you may want to read my latest poem, 'Itmon'- Claudia Krizay- keep up the good work in your writing, Amrit!

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Lalitha iyer 02 June 2010

You are simply great............the way you open the eyes of blind ones like me with simple truths and simple illustrations........in the form of stories everybody would like to read.......the philosophy of life, the invaluable truths just put into simple easily digestible verses.........so beautiful are those arresting words............the combination of ugliness and beauty apparent and ofcourse ugliness too apparent only........and how the opposite effect on inherent spirit and the ironic tragedy............and of course the basic moral lesson and the eternal beauty of sitting at the sea shore.............everything is immensely perfect and its a great feeling reading your pieces.................

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Kitty Vans 02 June 2010

it was pretty and i liked how you had everything worded

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