The Nookie Den Poem by Shaun Cronick

I'd like to buy some nookie please,
If you have any that will do,
Haven't a clue what it is,
I'll leave that up to you.

I simply like the sound of it,
It sounds so naughty and nice.
Like this house of ill-repute,
Swarming with drugs and vice.

If you haven't any nookie,
I'll take a fallen woman instead.
And lots and lots of cocaine too,
To snort while we're in bed.

I've lost my moral compass,
Me a judge of high court.
I'm such a total hypocrite,
In drugs and vice I do consort.

I simply can't control myself,
This constant insatiable sex drive.
Which isn't bad when I think,
Now I've just turned eighty five.