The Discriminating Letterbox Poem by Sheena Blackhall

I am a discriminating Letterbox
I welcome cards of a celebratory nature
Congratulations, birthday & Christmas cards
Personal, hand written letters (not customised round robins)
Books of a size commensurate with my ingress
Cheques and the year's first two calendars
Postcards from family who still retain
The ancient skill of writing

I am a discriminating Letterbox
I recognise the need to accept incoming bills
Electoral queries, contracts requiring a signature
All things bona fide, above board

I am a discriminating Letterbox
I do not welcome the paper deluge of spam
Cascading through my mouth like a noxious flood
I spit upon Holiday Brochures
I defecate upon unsolicited insurance policies
I incinerate funeral directors, will touts, credit offerings
Catalogues, pizza ads, lottery scams
And all associated spams and scams
Polluters of the atmosphere
Space invaders
Carpet paper grenades
Annihilators of rain forests everywhere
As from tomorrow, I warn you,
My lips are sealed