The Affects Of A Betrayal Poem by Annette Aitken

The Affects Of A Betrayal

As I lay down on my bed alone in the dark
my heart is pounding so fast I think it is going
to burst right out of my chest.
The thumping in my head is dancing
to the same uneasy rhythm of my heartbeat
As variously as a heavy metal scuzz song
uncomprehensible and extremely loud.

Laying under the weight of this
overwhelming feeling of betrayal
like a noose tightening its grip around my throat.
I become aware of my shallow breathing
and the fear of in taking a deep breath
may bring untold chaos down on me.
Without me having the strength to fight it off.

If I give into these overwhelming feelings of
panic, anxiety, and fear
the fear of the unknown of what might occur
if I allow myself to relax and go with the flow
(will I die?)
The fear is so great, the pure fear
of giving into these feelings
may lead to my death.

All of this because of a betrayal of
someone I once gave my heart and soul to
Can you die from a broken heart?
So scared to breath in case I can.