Slit my throat,
Slit my arms,
Stab that knife in both of my palms,
...
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If she knows you are doing this to yourself and still doesn't come back. She is not the one... you don't need somebody to make the cuts deeper... you need somebody to heal them.
The thought of killing mysel has plagued me many a time but now it is time to move on and realize that time will heal, you should talk to someone about the way you feel a friend perhaps. Be strong cry, scream do whatever it is you need to do to release yourself from her.