Saturday, January 23, 2016

Shadows Comments

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My soul is deep, just like my bed.
So deep I don't even realize what's underneath it.
It could be a storm, like a hurricane.
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Emily Cartmell
COMMENTS
Subhas Chandra Chakra 16 April 2016

My soul is deep, just like my bed. So deep I don't even realize what's underneath it. It could be a storm, like a hurricane. Like opening a book, I start to unfold. To eventually tell you all my secrets, because I can't hold it in anymore. Nice lines of opening.I enjoyed them. Some beautiful lines are.. As a shadow, you stare into my eyes, And wonder who I am. I can keep it in, but I won't. You'll be like a diary And a very nice ending with a touch of kindness from a tender heart. Thank you dear poetess. It deserves 10++ Subhas

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Emily Cartmell 23 January 2016

From my last poem, i received some negative comments about it. Feel free to list some improvements if you would like! But i wouldn't want to receive comments that judge my poems please! ! ! -Emily,12

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Fabrizio Frosini 23 January 2016

my comment on your poem was not negative, Emily. Not at all. I simply tried to tell you what the form you did choose (haiku) reall mean.. But I appreciated your verse

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