Self-Reliant In Madness Poem by Jinnuraine Jaigirdar

Shadow Sentiments: Self-Reliant If two poles dwell within a person—one of melancholy, the other of agitation—then that person becomes, at times, as still as a frozen lake, and at other times, restless in a blaze of inner fire. Mental illness is no longer an external force; it becomes one's own shadow. It clings to the shoulders, refuses to let go—sometimes embracing with tenderness, sometimes shattering the core with unutterable screams. Looking around this life, it seems I am not alone—I dwell in a land quietly suffering from shared madness. Perhaps everyone, in their own way, nurtures a fragment of this illness—some openly, some in secret. A yellow hue glows in the eyes—not light, but the pale gleam of a sickly affliction; in the heart, a pain that gradually robs all colour. Everywhere, I see only faded, ailing souls. And yet, standing within this affliction, the person builds themselves anew—both illness and remedy, both question and answer. They seek no pity, no soft gaze of sympathy. They are self-reliant in madness. An unyielding being who knows that even illness can become a language of selfhood.