The guy in the red sweater
posted up at the high table across from my booth
watched me as I struggled my way through tables
past wet signs and on-lookers
...
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Wow! This is an intimate poem which reveals to the reader the very thoughts you guard and do NOT reveal to the man or woman. You describe this scene with sharp details that make a stranger into a familiar. That's awkwardly put by me
but it happens gracefully in the poem. There are three descriptive passages that I love: his mouth open between awe and speech - you phrase it brilliantly! Second, the effect of his silken voice on you and the discipline you must exert to keep it private. Third, your awareness of your desire which cannot be expressed even in the poem. There's something sacred here - a desire that must remain veiled, but still a genuine deeply felt emotion conveyed to reader and self alike. This is a remarkable poem of our interior lives, so rich as they are in feelings and desires, and that interiority is not about action in the world but rather about deep emotion in our psyches. This is bittersweet and beautiful poetry.
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Wow! This is an intimate poem which reveals to the reader the very thoughts you guard and do NOT reveal to the man or woman. You describe this scene with sharp details that make a stranger into a familiar. That's awkwardly put by me but it happens gracefully in the poem. There are three descriptive passages that I love: his mouth open between awe and speech - you phrase it brilliantly! Second, the effect of his silken voice on you and the discipline you must exert to keep it private. Third, your awareness of your desire which cannot be expressed even in the poem. There's something sacred here - a desire that must remain veiled, but still a genuine deeply felt emotion conveyed to reader and self alike. This is a remarkable poem of our interior lives, so rich as they are in feelings and desires, and that interiority is not about action in the world but rather about deep emotion in our psyches. This is bittersweet and beautiful poetry.