Picture This Comments

Quite relevent to the world issues. I would reccomend a look over for gramatical errors but overall good job

wonderful poem.. no more word to be said.

first things being first, the grammar/misspelling nits: too many to count; excruciating; cigarette; prisoner of (not to): situations do (not does) and, by the same token, them (not it): they've been (not they been) through): put it (not them) referring to piece): as (not a) strong as): and different (double 'f') . having survived my critical eye, you deserve a doff of my hat to your empathy. not because your relating to the visuals you saw and, therefore, repainted before your reader are borne on your very own past, which is a thankful present, but that you wish on the people you feel for your very same perspective. and that's as good as having changed yourself. it was up to you, it is now up to them. the question is: are they equal to your task? maybe if you keep writing they will be. so go, girl.

This is A Beautiful Poem!

Very extraordinary writing. You really know how to exploit your plume like a human exploits land to make vast crop lands and beautiful rose bushes. Amazingly done.

Wow.10/10. It's a shame stuff like this actually occurs.

You are very sensitive to the suffering, it shows in your poem. There are things in life that are so sad, things we see are forever etched in our memory and are recalled vividly. We must balance the Sad and the Happy things of Life. Wonderful writing, heartfelt.....10

yeah......it is a terrible world we live in..........nice write dear....well penned

A very moving write indeed, Breeze. It is truly sad that this kind of evil takes place in our world. Your last verse hold out the hope for recovery. I am often amazed at the ability of the human psyche to recover from the gravest of situations. Thanks for a wonderful read. Richard

Let us pray for a better world....your poem is very touching.

Keep moving even if you have to be the last person standing.This is whats life all about.Good job dear.

......a poem full of imaginative sympathy for the poor and the suffering womanhood...... a good poem with reeling heart. CP

very nice :) .....very sad! ! ! : ( my kind of poem! ! ! u r an excellent writer

A beautiful piece of poetry, granting a picture of the real world infested with drugs. you projected my thoughts to beggers in the capital of SriLanka, step into busses carrying infants begging for coins to feed the innocent. Oneday I followed one in disguise what he really towards. He rushed into a slum and found to be smoking Herion. Oh what a pathetic story. The little one was just rolling over by his side and he didn't care of the innocent till he finish the sniff. What an elegant ay of painting the image in your mind. Thanks sharing.10++++

nice piece. nicely written, nice, nice, nice

it has a realistic feel ti it i like the vibe a good one breeze i'll give u a TEN!

So realistic! It touches my heart.

I love the story vibe and the creativity yu portrayed through your wording. excellent job in getting that image across, the title is perfect for this because i can say i did 'picture this'. the idea that all these things happen everyday is a wonderful standpoint and the message does come across in the end as how i mthink you meant for it to be, that in the end although all these things can and really do happen, people stick their heads high, hold onto that piece of themselves that is strong, and stay stong, stay alive. the metaphors and similes are breathtaking, i've read alot of poems, but i absolutely love this part: 'the wind cracks my face like sidewalk cement' overall this is a wonderful poem, the only critique might be that you should capitalize and structure where you want your paragraphs to be. i love the flow though, so don't get rid of that.

this is a great poem it shows some one that lives on the streets point of veiw i really do like it =)

There are a lot of people who are in trouble and need help. Thanks for sharing. I like how the poem acts a a little story because it makes me feel like it's in reality rather than just in a poem. I like how you can put reality situations into a poem. Thanks for sharing because I am reminded of always having a nice, warm heart that's full of kindness.