Ph: Life: As I Get Older Comments

after the first stanza (which i enjoyed) , i am looking forward to the rest. i'm waiting for the part about the diapers. after stanza two.......interesting rhyme scheme. can you keep it up? ? the third stanza repeats what i've heard you refer to in the past: you seem to have a devotion to a belief in God, but not necessarily a belief in what churches teach. my loss of my belief in what the church-of-my-youth taught, caused me to also lose my belief in God. i'm satis-fied............. and may end up.........fried! yikes! - - - - - - - - - - - - - - i can hardly believe you've managed to keep the scheme through the fourth stanza, and still the poem ain't bad! :) fifth stanza and struggling a bit with rhyming i think, but good effort. flow'r? why not just flower? and where did the flow'r come from? but this stanza holds my favorite lines (so far) : Only earth impact is certain Like a feather, like a stone, .............i hope your landing is gentle. a gentle giant impact! - - - - - - - - Bulletin: [rather like bullet in isn't it? a clue to YOUR demise? ] Renowned physicist, friend, and poet dies in Mountain View! Mourned by many. (details on page 12 B) . - - - - - - - - - - - Student's lives the ones that shine..........you probably want Students'. or not? - - - - - well, i guess you did it. congratulations. bri :) ============== As Bri Gets Older As the Bri-guy gets even older, no longer can he move a boulder. Now he leans upon her shoulder, and slowly, slowly he does moulder. And he ponders this question silly: why does the u(added) not add a different sound to just plain o? Never mind me; my ould mind is slow!

Enjoyed the whole poem especially the second stanza: Poem's birth a new obsession Like a weed fighting for life Rooted in imagination Married to soul like a wife. A genetic new expression Your child, not an alien! As our age advances and life becomes more leisurely, poems become an obsession and turn inalienable like a wife to a man or a child to the parents!