Personal Hell(Tw) Poem by Unfortunate Fellow

I look at this THING I possess
The body they claim to be mine
I try to climb out of this vessel but I am trapped inside
I scream to be set free
For freedom I'd do anything
Yet all I get is this HELL.
I was told to love this vessel since it is what I am imprisoned in
but no.
I couldn't
How could others be comfortable yet I am stuck here
like THIS.
I turned to despise this body.
I cut and sliced my wrists, my chest, my thighs, and neck.
For I believed it was the way to get to the vessel that would be truly mine
truly ME
but it wasn't enough.
I began trying to kill the vessel.
I was never able to go all the way.
It hurt
It HURTS
This body built for someone else.
I thought I would deal with it,
that I could value this body as if it wasn't my hell
but no
The mirrors and windows tormented me
The people at school tormented me
My family tormented me
The only saw the vessel not the soul
for I am the soul.
They would rather look at the vessel
the repulsive horrid THING.
There are some things I like of this moving corpse
the few freckles on the body
the void eyes that show both love and anguish as well as anger.
The thick hair is lovely too.
But that is it.
The chest, the voice, the EVERYTHING ELSE
Was like someone was stabbing me
Cutting all over my true body
Slicing it
attempting to tear me away from it.
They tried to take away what I value most
MY TRUTH.
They ripped and tore at it as I tried to preserve it
no matter how much and long I wept
they just kept pulling
I did not want to lose it
To lose ME.
I kicked them away but they try everyday
I worry that they will rip me to sheds for my existence.