Out Of Focus Comments

Out of place and out of time, out of well-defined features, watery sense of isolation and dramatic double-face not overlapping in a clear portrait/photo: I look at this poem of yours as at sort of living sketch, a charcoal drawing of a mask fighting and playing years of indefinite sadness on good intensions; a static powerlessness which excavates a deep pond inside Those eyes look like the Ancient Mariner’s eyes without their impelling power A very good poem, in my opinion A cluster of hard sounds in the first 5 lines gives and evokes the idea of harsh digging, at the 6th line the turning point melts into the sweeter flowing of tears, a cluster of /s/ sounds

This is very nice, David. You captured it in so few words. Nice to see you posting again. Raynette