On The Beach Comments

This is a wonderful poem! The substance at the background of the poem makes it captivating...top score

I love the way you use words- - - - - - - Tuesday was dehydrated when The afternoons was past its prime, Heat still writhes - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -Crisped swimmers line the sands; planning their salvation- - - - - - -Surfing greenery, in prairies of kelp. The title made me think of Nevil Shute's novel On The Beach. I am extremely influenced by titles, I wish more writers put this kind of thought into the title that is the preface, the lead in, the stage setting. And your creative use of words has me jumping up and down! ! Great write- -you say you are not a poet.... ummmmm, watch it, you might be proving yourself wrong!

Beautiful scenes of beach is added with the notes of your intelligence which is just mixed with enough ingredients to attract the hearts of the feeble and the strong.. Thank you so much Kevin Patrick..

This is a brilliant work. There's something life affirming, especially in the last stanza. As I started reading, I immediately recalled Shute's novel, On the Beach. In that work, the world ends. In your work, the world is rediscovered. Just amazing!

Memories of breathing crucify but strengthens in this interesting phase of life. What an amazing imagery is drawn really! This is interesting too. Green weeds bulge towards the surface with passion. EXCELLENT.10

Above the sun pierces the waters skin Memories of breathing, crucify my lungs Gravity pulls me back to the living Out from the seas of the naked church Where waves dye on the beach And childhood is out of reach - wonderful poem...voted 10