Now You Know Comments

Wow! This is excellent work for such a young writer. But I'm somewhat puzzled by just who you are describing - is it yourself as you are now or as you envision yourself to be in some future time - or is it an amalgam of many other people -either people you know personally or know in some other way. This is important because to my mind the overuse of the word 'You' diminishes the overall impact. One exercise I like to give to budding poets is to ask them: How many 'unnecessary' words can they remove from their poem, before the essential meaning is lost? This piece might benefit from such a task. But don't get me wrong; I think you show real promise and the best thing you can do now is just continue to write. Believe me, the more you write the better you will become! Best Wishes Dave

This poem was incredible I enjoyed it thoroughly! :) Its so deep and true! :) very beautifully written :) your an amazing poet ^_^