My Liver Knows Her Better Poem by Gagan Khurana

Tonight, again I drank too much,

I drank because remembering her hurts less with whisky.

Every peg offers a confession, a curse and her.

Each sip tore apart what I had stitched badly with my ego.

Each peg brought a different bastard to the table-



First Peg

For the first time she said, 'You are Special'.



Second Peg

To forget what dignity tastes like.



Third Peg

To piss on the song, I once wrote for her.



Fourth Peg

For every time she said, 'Gagan you are overthinking'.



Fifth Peg

For the tattooed boy, she introduced me to as 'Just a friend'.



Sixth Peg

For the hour she said, 'I need space and filled it with him'.



Seventh Peg

To Convince myself, I never mattered to her.



Eighth Peg

To delete all her messages and photos.



Ninth Peg

To tell the bartender stop asking me if I am okay.



Tenth Peg

For every time, I chose humiliation over choosing you.



Eleventh Peg

To poison the hope that one day she will realize.



Twelfth Peg

To black out the memory of holding her.





Hey, what happened, the damn whisky bottle ended, but the damage isn't.

Bartender bring the bloody tequila shots now & keep them coming,

Let's see if this Mexican piss has more guts than the scotch that just surrendered.



First Tequila Shot

For the blessed day, she handed out our personal secret to the very man, she swore meant nothing.



Second Shot

For letting her turn my career, my business, my bloody sweat-built empire into collateral
fucking damage.



Third Shot

For the insomnia she gifted me.



Fourth Shot

For mistaking manipulation for affection again and again.



Fifth and the last shot

For finally raising a glass to myself, not her

Because if I survive this, I swear, I will never drink in someone else's honor.

© Gagan Khurana