My Hand. Poem by Thabani Khumalo

Only by my hand alone I want to win.
Once I lost everything I tried to keep:
I lost a girl of strata and a high rate;
I lost a Mistress. I lost a Queen;
I lost a Lady... and ladies are hard to come by.

But in life I want everything and an unthinkable most.
A queen by postulate was not enough,
even though I had everything in a queen.
It was time to go, not a time to marry and stay:
A time to go and find the thing that I really adore -
I know I yearn for it to render me a beaming shine -
At the most in life, I love invigorated fame.

I want to be famous in the category of Jesus the saint;
to have many people under my care and exercise my power over their minds;
to cleanse their brain to open for the new and the brighter light;
a light unknown even to the infinite universe;
to permeate elucidation into their darkest night;
to spring a clear thought onto a farther frontier -
a frontier of extending concentric horizons,
and ordain a layman with the hat of the Lord -
who is far away in the land of paradise.

I want to be credited with the knowledge of all facades,
and as one who teaches it to the wide-eared mass,
which is why I want the biggest ledge upon which to lay foot.
Human race is in danger of extinction
and if there is any good in evolving into eternal life,
then one good man is obligated to stand and teach only the truth.

The answer is in the minds of the people reading from their universe:
man coming at even terms with his supposed maker;
man becoming a creature of his own fashioning,
for the very least to become like the holy almighty God.
I want to preach the gospel of righteousness -
that "self love" and wanting the best for yourself is the beginning of righteousness.

I want to make a promise to build
a manor of many mansions in it for my like companions,
to allow infiltration of the truth into the life of the world
and leave the greedy to bicker in tomes of cunningly contriving lies.
I want powerful fame because, by my hand,
I really want to heal.