Friday, July 13, 2012

Listen To Our Shout Comments

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I sit here and mourn the loss of kin,
because of another countries sin,
I think of the families feeling so bereft
the wives, mothers and children they left
...
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Julie Hutton
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Paul Brookes 13 July 2012

I understand the sentiments of this poem and with a little work it could be great but some of the rhyme is clumsyand stanza VI is ambiguous line 4 could be read as the powers that be whose lives must cease, not those of the soldiers However it it is a good effort and I agree with what you are trying to say: O) Paul P.S. feel free to criticize my poems which are not perfect by any means.

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Julie Hutton

Julie Hutton

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