The Japanese have a communal bathing tradition
They gather in a bath house of their own volition
But this practice was falling out of favour
And people wanted to try this and savour
...
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Paul, this might work better if you lose the rhyme strait-jacket. The subject matter is fascinating; the handling of it
is forced and awkward (You can attend a lecture AS IT Can BE SEEN) . Free verse time?
If you'd like, check out my new website:
jeffersoncarterverse.com
Let me know how you like it. Yrs, JC
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Paul, this might work better if you lose the rhyme strait-jacket. The subject matter is fascinating; the handling of it is forced and awkward (You can attend a lecture AS IT Can BE SEEN) . Free verse time? If you'd like, check out my new website: jeffersoncarterverse.com Let me know how you like it. Yrs, JC