Into Your Eyes Comments

Let me swim in the dark pools of your eyes let me live alone in your starry skies I could become immortal in your gaze beyond a lifetime, beyond my days Let me fall victim to your wiles one look from you beguiles Me from beginning to end let us transcend both space and time begin at the end, will you be mine?

This is a really interesting piece, very atmospheric. I've been trying to write a poem about eyes for a while, and it's hard to do without sounding trite, so well done to you!