I Was Only A Little Girl Poem by Ella Rose

Curled up in a ball in the corner, down on bended knee,
waiting for a sign that someone could hear me.

Heart broken, fragile picture perfect images,
-of a tragic past and misguided souls.
Because of your influence, I am the way that I am today,
too angry to love completely, and too scared to say…
-what I really feel.

Too guilty to think about me, and too sad to really see, all the good deep down in me.
Where were you? I understand that you ARE here today, and I find that ok, but for arguments sake, did you ever think what you had at stake?

A loving wife, and beautiful kids, did you know when you came home,
every one of us hid? I would create drama's, to distract mom even more,
I made things even worse, and then I was the bad girl.
With perfect long brown curls, big deep doe eyes,
apprehensive to be myself, wearing a disguise.
Hurting while crying, running while being chastised.
I grew up needing so much from others for my own happiness.

But nothing is ever enough,
-for me…

Because I don't deserve happiness, not like they do.
I get sad from time to time, and think I'll go out of my mind,
but the tears just don't solve, all the years with no love,
-from him.