I Do Not Need Your Help Poem by Richard D Remler

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I would like you to know
That your case has been heard.
I've considered your plan,
Yes! I've heard every word
How some jobs are too much
For one person to do.
But maybe you haven't quite
Thought this plan through.

Now don't get me wrong.
Please don't think me a prude.
And forgive me if ever
I seem somewhat rude,
But I plan things, you see,
In a most honest way.
So, to get right to the point,
I need no help today.

I do not need your help.
I need no help at all.
Oh, I can do it myself.
All the big and the small
Jobs are all quite the same
When you see things my way.
I do not need your help.
I need no help today.

I will do all the sweeping.
I'll vacuum. I'll mop.
I will dust every nick-knack,
And I'll simply not stop
Until I see a fine shine
On every one within reach.
Then I'll re-tile the Kitchen.
And I'll do it in peach!

Next, I will fix up the fence
That borders the yard.
Why, it will look almost new,
And it won't be too hard.
You see, I will do all the work
That I've set out to do,
Like re-carpet the Front Room
And paint the walls blue.

Oh, of course you can see
I have everything planned.
I know you mean well,
But I don't need a hand,
Or a foot, or a finger,
Or even a shoe.
So, why do you linger
When I've so much to do?

Now the windows need washing,
And by washing, I'm meaning,
I just won't be done
'Til those windows are gleaming.
And by gleaming, I'm meaning
To see quite a shine.
Yes! Quite, quite a shine
In those windows of mine.

No, I do not need your help.
You see, I needn't any.
I will do quite well, thank you.
Boy, if I had a penny
For all of the times
Someone offered a hand.
Why, I'd be the wealthiest
Chick in the land.

Now the cake needs some baking.
The cookies I'll frost.
Why, just look at all
Of the time I have lost
Standing here arguing
With someone like you.
I do not need your help.
So move along now. Please do!

Now I see something alarming
That bothers me, so
Those drapes in the hallway
Will just have to go.
I don't care for that color.
They're simply too sheer.
And I don't like anything
That sheer in here.

Oh, I know how you feel.
Your concern has been noted.
Every word carved in stone,
And so frequently quoted.
But I do not need your help.
Not at all, I must say.
I've got quite enough, thank you,
That I must do today!

And just what is today?
March the Second, I think.
Oh, I've so much to do
That I'm just tickled pink.
Thanksgiving is only
Nine short months away.
I'm so glad I remembered.
I'll start work today.

I will buy a fine turkey.
I'll roast it. I'll baste it.
It'll melt in your mouth.
Oh, just wait 'til you taste it!
And the raspberry sauce
Will be tangy and sweet.
Made from my own home grown
Berries picked ready to eat.

I'll whip up some potatoes.
And I'll candy some yams
With some fluffy marshmallows.
Then I'll roast a fine ham,
Honey-glazed and quite juicy,
With a pineapple crown.
Oh, it will surely be tender,
And quite golden brown.

I do not need your help.
No, I will manage just fine.
All it takes is some planning,
And a bit of free time.
And I've planned everything
That I'll do, to the letter.
And as some days tend to be,
This just can't get any better.

Some pies will be nice.
I will make about nine.
And I think rhubarb and apple
Sound rather divine.
With some peach, and some berry,
And yes, apricot.
They will smell just like heaven.
Oh, I kid you not!

What do you mean
I'm in over my head?
Haven't you heard any
Thing that I've said?
This is all nothing new.
See, I've done this before.
Why, I can do all of this
Plus a hundred things more.

Did I just say a hundred?
Well, how silly of me.
I can do more than that.
I can do two, or three,
Even four times as much
As I thought, so you see.
I do not need your help.
And you're flaking the brie!

I just have to make puddings.
Grandma's tapioca will do.
I'll mix some rice pudding
And color it blue.
With some fruit salad for Bill.
Oh, don't say I won't make it.
Because I know that I will.
It's a vow. I'll not break it!

Now the potatoes need mashing.
The onions need dicing.
The yams need some apples.
The pastries need icing.
The French Bread needs baking
In a very French way.
So I do not need your help.
I need no help today.

And then, to top it all off,
An incomparable delight!
I'll will make something simple
And call it a night.
Some popcorn and fudge
Will do just the trick.
Give me a moment.
I'll make some up real quick.

When I am finished,
I'll look over it all.
Everything I have done,
All the big and the small
Jobs that I did by myself,
Did them right, every one,
And know in my heart
That the work was well done.


Copyright © MMX By Richard D. Remler