Hate Myself 🥺😢 Poem by Miracle Oguine

I'm sitting by the window, lacking energy today,
Listening to cicadas as they begin to play.
Nightfall unfolds, fireflies dance so bright,
Stars twinkle above, creating a celestial delight.

But the door feels out of reach, stuck on this floor,
My heart feels empty, as if it's needing something more.
A soul that has departed, leaving me a mere ghost,
Yearning for change, desiring a heart to boast.

This month I'll seek a new heart, leaving the old behind,
Erasing memories, losing track of what's intertwined.
I don't mind the suffering, the loss of past treasures,
For a fresh start awaits, filling me with newfound pleasures.

In this moment, I resent you and all that you portray,
Your smile, your attire, the scent you wear each day.
With open arms, I pray to God, feeling utterly hopeless,
Unable to offer aid when I despise myself in this mess.

Today, this hour, this minute, I just want to mute my mind and feelings, how can I shine when I am still undone and the end never seems to be coming,
I hate myself, and I hate myself.
These words echo within, my mind in a state of stealth.