Godwin Was A Slave Comments

If I hear back from you, JTGH, I may leave more comments. ;) bri (NOT Mr. Bri, unless you really want to use that name)

Since you used 'has never' in line 6, I suggest 'sung', not 'sang' in line 7. lines 8 & 9: I don't know what line 8 means. IF it means he was kept in a metal cage, he still could have slept with someone if the cage was large enough! ;)

line 6: I would probably use 'a bed'. line 2: Godwin could have been loved, even though he may not have been aware of it or he may not remember it.

line 1: generally I would NOT refer to a person or persons/people as 'that'. line 5: 'So he doesn't know how old he was! ' Generally I'd pair 'doesn't' with 'is', or 'didn't' with 'was', NOT 'doesn't' with 'was'.

In any case, welcome to PH, a free but not perfect site for poetry. There may be no 'perfect site' for anyone. : )) bri

I read it and it has promise; I MIGHT GIVE you some SUGGESTIONS, ...if i hear back from you. And 'tooth for tart' is? ? I bet you, as I did, will find no site about that phrase. I tried & found sites about tartar on teeth, and for tat, etc. but no 'teeth for tart'.

Sylvia may be a nice person and she is sure to enjoy hearing you say God bless in your response to her comment, but don't take her word(s) for how 'excellent' your poem is.

Excellent narration, loveliest worded, TOP Marks for the poem, enjoyed tremendously, and TFS