Getting Older Poem by Phil Soar

I've never felt the need to climb a mountain
I'm out of breath just climbing up a hill
I won't be running marathons for certain
If I feel bad, I'll take another pill
My ageing face sometimes make me uncomfortable
When I look in the mirror, it's a shock
My stomachs got so big it's unbelievable
When I look down I cannot see my cock
I've now got hairs in places I don't need them
My wrinkles, like a map of subway trains
My bowels seem like I always need to clean them
And leave the loo with very nasty stains