Everyday Comments

a true friend takes that first step... nice poem M A

It's a seemly poem. A nice one that is able to potray the longing and hurt that you wanted to paint. There's quite a number of stories with storylines similar to the plot here, and many poets have tried to express it in their poetry. Most do not really pass though.Thus, I think you have done a commendable job here as it does evoke my feelings. For more moving poetry, perhaps you could play around with the pauses. Sense pauses and pauses caused by punctuation marks and line spacings can add added impact to a phrase or line. So, do try it out sometime! Meanwhile, thanks for a nice read, and hope u have a nice day ahead!