Evening softly falls
Blurring the lines of present
I see your pale face
Quite clearly in the darkness
...
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I am glad to see you embracing this form. You have done it justice
Very nice! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !
Blurring the lines of present.... This is so nice to read. Well expressed.
This poem is so quiet I felt like I was holding my breath. The past is slowly opening up: the pale face has to clear up, get stronger and sharper, and then the past will be present in the present. And perhaps you and the past person can finally talk things through. But the mood is fragile, you don't want to dispel it.
Thanku for sterling review. It's my first humble attempt at Tanka. Thanks for the boost I needed.