Dungeon.....(Of The Mind) ... Poem by Annette Aitken

Dungeon.....(Of The Mind) ...

Rating: 5.0


Dungeon

Trapped within this dungeon
protruding spikes of spiralling
twisted metal creeps down
the turret stairwell.

The slamming of cast-iron doors
echoing as the damp moss-covered floors
and the overgrown ivy strangles
all it clings to.

Shadows lurking in every corner
as distant voices cry out
vibrations bouncing off the walls
as sunlight is buried beneath the ground.

Whilst the heart of a thoroughbred
races within my chest
galloping through the misty glens
as panic starts to set in.

Is there no escaping this dreadful place
will the darkness ever subside
will resting conscience, ever
allow peace to reside.

In this dark and dismal place, I call my mind.

by
Annette Aitken
2016

Thursday, December 29, 2016
Topic(s) of this poem: mind
POET'S NOTES ABOUT THE POEM
max or lax of head room
COMMENTS OF THE POEM
Bri Edwards 29 April 2017

i could NOT wait for your 'call'. yes, i am hasty i suppose. putting into May showcase asap (almost ASAP, but not quite so fast) . bri ;) Thanks.

0 0 Reply
Bri Edwards 28 April 2017

spikes......creep no s needed; easy mistake to make and overlook. but i REALLY like [love, actually] the stanza otherwise. loving the poem so far. will resting conscience, ever...... i say that the comma is not needed, BUT it does seem to serve a 'good' purpose here. i enjoyed the snatches of rhyming. the extended title was a clue to the ending, but Bri likes to think in terms of REAL dungeons..... [i had one put in our house here; only 3 prisoners at this time; i caught one putting a parking ticket on our car one night]....so, , , , the ending, cleverly separated from preceding lines, caught me by SURPRISE! a great poem. However, i'm sorry your mind is like that. : ( : ( i thought the only thing i did not understand was your Poet's Note. do i have to be British? to MyPoemList for sure and to May's showcase IF you don't object. call me! hee-hee. bri :) this might have been scary for me, EXCEPT for the fact i am so used to our dungeon by now. every week i have to drag out the corpses, UNLESS the living prisoners (or rats) have gotten to them before i make my visit. a few bones i can carry out quite easily! bri :)

0 0 Reply
Susan Williams 13 February 2017

Reading this gave me the shivers {{{{{ shiver }}}}. Your images in this were on point.and building the frightening environment of a dungeon with every line 10

0 0 Reply
Seamus O Brian 06 January 2017

Perfectly chilling. I could feel the cold, familiar chill grip me as I read further, knowing too well these dark places. Brilliant writing, Annette.

0 0 Reply
Bill Cantrell 29 December 2016

Wow, your poetry keeps growing with every poem

0 0 Reply
READ THIS POEM IN OTHER LANGUAGES
Close
Error Success