Dumb Things I'Ve Gotta Do Today Poem by Gary Diamond

I could draw up a list but am not equal to the effort.
I'd rather sit in bed all day, farting and sleeping
Trying to devise a cure for the hangover that's crippling.

The list will come together.
Although I try a life of leisure.
My mind won't let me hang about forever.
There are some dumb things I've gotta do today.

Somewhere in there the clothes have to be washed
The dishes have to be done.
I have to eat for Christ's sake.
Or better still, for my sake.

I'll have to wash and dress in a new clean set of clothes
Because I can't just wash and sit around in the robe.
Perhaps it's time for that lawn to be mowed
A couple more dumb things I gotta do today.

Tapping my fingers on my head, on the table.
Exhaling in strange ways, like you do when thinking.
Racking that sleep-addled brain
Finding adequate ways to sew up the time.

I have to get down the deposit and the key for the lock
Of the new place, I'm moving, get everything boxed
I've done it four times this year, it's becoming a crock
And now another dumb set of things to be done today.

The hangover still rankles but the plans getting clearer
The time to go shopping that gets a little nearer.
To cure this malady I've devised a solution
Drink orange juice, eat salad and pray absolution
I may not have the genius of a Newton
But I got more things on my big dumb list.

For the record I am a genius and so are you.
Maybe you just haven't discovered your calling yet
But it's there, lurking around in you somewhere.
Maybe when you're going through your own damn dumb list
You'll figure that one out.