Do I Dare? Poem by Christina Phillips

Laying in my bed, visions running through my head
I'm scared for me, I'm scared for him
I'm scared to go out on a limb
No matter what I do, no matter what I say, they will always cast me astray
As I shed tears of madness, I cannot give in to the sadness
I am a monster
I see me to be
I sabotage myself from achieving success of the highest degree
I want to flee my right to be, but I cannot see what lies ahead of me
Until the path becomes clearer, sadness does become dearer
And the death of my soul that awaits, is only my destined fate
'Help! ' I might say, but honestly I might stay
If that means I might get to meet the love of my life, and escape this plight
You may think I'm lying, but just look at me, I'm dying
Dying, but trying
If only I could see, see what lies in front of me
My life right now makes me furrow my brow
This isn't a life I want to stick around for
Some try to tell me that there's more
I don't believe them, I don't listen
I simply care about the love I'm missin'
The one that loves my eyes and my lips
The one that makes me glow, all the way from the tip of my head to the very last toe
The one that helps me grow
I long for that love
To embrace me, like how the wings of a dove embrace the air, so simply, and without a care
Do I dare?
Wish for such a spark?
As I lie here in the dark, contemplating whether to make a mark, I ponder
Should I stick around?
Or do I submit to the demons that surround