Friday, March 27, 2015

Dark King Comments

Rating: 0.0

The best I've seen is the darkness,
Its little silent but I swear: it's the best thing I've ever seen.
All the wide opened eyes gets closed,
All the talker's mouth gets shut up.
...
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Ishwor Pathak
COMMENTS
Tinnie Moe 26 April 2015

I feel as if the last phrases are not cohesive with the first. You describe yourself as a fearsome creature of the night with only a few that understand, but in the end you demand to love your parents and you wife, though they don't understand you.... it doesn't make sense. Not the last alignant. It seems misguided. Love the first of the poem though.

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Kelly Kurt 27 March 2015

A good message in a poem. Thank you for sharing.

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