Confounding Valedictions Poem by Hannington Mumo

Otiosity and absurdity, wayward traits of ludicrous youth,
Two swiftest vehicles to rapid ruin and all infinite untruth,
Most casual routes seasonally taken by simpletons who die;
Tell me, where ought one to begin as they bid you goodbye?

If tasked to recount all the overgenerosities of profligate years together spent
Then I should start with a preamble wherein your idiocy my infant senses bent,
Wherein your rash thirsts mutinied against all placidity of calm thought and wit,
And silly hungers scared sharp puerile logic, for long establishing ill sway over it.

It'd overtire memory and nerve and sinew and all serviceable members
To tell of every thoughtless exploit powered by otiose or absurd embers;
Yet reminiscence can hardly disremember the most outrageous of episodes
When these twin vile masters ruled my tender turns like libidinous demigods.

Now, where ought one to start as they bid such iniquitous mates adieu?
For farewells are fitting for valued pals briefly parting to gain meet anew,
Truly precious friends from whom you break with merited tear and cheer;
Not uncherished foes who fashion a futile friendship out of ill-founded fear.