Chances Poem by Kevin Carney

I’ve fought so long, you will never see…
Never could you understand what it’s been like.
So in and out of so much turmoil,
it almost makes me bleed.
Going on,
pulling out everything my soul has to offer to you.

I would tear out my heart if it would make the difference.
Believe me it’s not a conquest of you I want,
I need you to believe.
That I could be loved, to see me for what I am.
You got to know it’s been all about you,
I don’t believe you understand.

Raging through my own hell,
just trying to keep you all together.
I just had to run it to the end,
I just couldn’t help but, see it all through.
So one sided this love could be,
it’s all about seeing it all in perspective.
I don’t think I really have the vision;
you are just blinded to how I feel.

What to do it was so hard to say,
so deflated in my own demise.
I saw you, the last time today;
it was all I could do to keep my senses.
You questioned my love for you;
I think you just played the game.
You questioned my loyalty and still you didn’t see.

Is it all about you and how you feel?
Did you look into my eyes and see what I would do for you?
If you couldn’t see then how blind are you?
I think you never will understand…

It’s no choice; sacrifice in the end, the best for everyone.
I’ve told you of my love, you never listened, deaf were your ears…
You could stay and look to see what you mean to me.
Instead you stared straight ahead and went back on your way.

It’s so ironic; I tried so hard to keep you safe.
You couldn’t believe in what I had to say.
Some might say you’re selfish, you play to get your way.
I’ve looked at you with so much hope and promise never could I doubt you.

It was just too hard to loose my belief in you….
When all your friends started to walk away,
so slowly one by one.
It’s so sad;
I tried to make them realize who you really are.
Maybe, I’ve been too naïve,
I just had to believe.

The chances you been given,
no one is ever that lucky…
I refused to look away,
maybe that was my mistake.
It’s starting to become clear that it so near the end,
after seeing you.
Unlike you, I am not going to get that second chance;
my hope for love has failed.