By Father's Bedside...Hospital Musings! 25, June Comments

Father would have felt the deep love from his son... a touching poem Saadat.Thank you for sharing.

what a powerful way of writing, you have a strong command of words to suit the picture you intend to convey to the reader

you have used images to their optimum effect and they bring out the poignancy of the piece with an amazing conviction...impressive! !

This is well crafted containing strong emotions that show the devotion of a son. I also appreciate your familiarity with the medical environment that notices tiny details and in a few words captures the scene.

Hi Saadat, I have also sat beside my Mum's bedside like this and can bring it to mind vividly at a moment's notice. Did he recover? If so best wishes to you both.

illness, coma and matron-- wow you have brought out that picture of the hospital well -10 anjali

dear sadat, shocked! and trying to relive the hospital scenario you have so clearly potrayed in your poem.a poem that hurts you from inside., yet beautifully written. ritty

well i couldn't ask about your father recently Sadat.. i mean i was sort of feeling down and and out too.... hope every thing is okay! ! ! as for the poem.. you really have crafted it well.. it needs talent to portray such a scene by a poetic words... nice indeed.. wish you well shan

Beautifully written piece on the hospital scene. you have captured the environment poetically..hope your father gets better soon...

oh sorry for not knowing that you wrote this poem and sorry as i lost a long comment which i wrote here, ..a touching poem from a poetic doctor who is forced to see some thing one day he offered to others...that painful restraintes on that hads while a dear one calling through his eyes to give him little release, , that waiting hours in that hall while squeezing hands while holding some fallig tears...that moment when we accept some thing some how could hurt our dad but what can we do..that is what has to be...a touching poem dear friend, hopig that things turn to better..best wishes for your dear Dad..

You create an atmosphere of pain and suffering so exactly here, with a touch of never-ending hope in the end...The power of prayers and light is always there.Thanks for sharing your experience, Saadat. A.

you bring out the cloinical atmosphere in the hospital devoid of any human touch very graphically. no wonder, staying in a hospital is an ordeal. your senses are acute and don't miss anything- a myraid of conflicting emotions- well expressed take care Mamta

Silence broken by a hushed converse Breaking news of comma’s reverse Alien aura of tubes and stands Silent heave swollen glands....meaningful and educative poem with deep inside knowledge.... good write. read mine papa do u know and papa you too/ along with o, mother

You have combined your emotional involvement with your inside knowledge of medical environments so effectively here. The shape is a lovely idea - thank you for your note on that.

Thanks for your note about the pattern formed Saadat, as I was watching it change and thought it was very clever. It not only rhymed with great rhythm, but you achieved this as well. 'purple bruises' and 'his quivering lips and shaking hands, how surreally fight the restraining band' stood out for me! Well done! 10 Karin Anderson

The scene you describe in this graphically depicted series of hospital snapshots will be readily recognized by anyone who has spent time in Intensive Care. I particularly liked the final couplet with its terse description of the spinster matron. You manage to convey a picture of efficiency, rather than compassion and sadly that is so often the case amongst those underpaid and overworked members of today's medical profession. I trust that the 'hope' you evoke with the vase shape of your poem is well and truly realized and that your father is soon up and about again. Love, Allie xxxx

Silence broken by a hushed converse Breaking news of comma’s reverse..... Excellent beginning lines, fixing the mood of the verse.I liked the shape of the poem.Brilliant. ...always pray for the well being of uncle....He will come round soon....Brishti

Wonderful touching of words...my prayers for your father's speedy recovery

wonderful! i pray yor father recovers 10

a heartrending poem...my prayer for your father recovery soon....