Blaqpearl Comments

This is really good, especially the final stanza, the line.....Black is the strand of hair that defines my ethnicity. You make a bond with the reader in its length which is unfolding a scape of destitude and desparation. You define the dystopia which emerges line after line and it's not pointless pathos it has depth and well placed anger. I sense alot of anger in this poem. The line... 'Not in my match box house where the sun knows not the sky' has kind of a biblical or perhaps Shakespearean tone to it. Several verses would do well in a slam.