Birds Try Walking Comments

I like the traditional touch...there's a good play of words that goes on in the first and second verses but the rhythmic sound flow is lost within verse 3. However, I don't know if it's accidental or deliberate but the second line of v3 seems to inform the reader of the change of rhythm: The rhythm is new; this is a good catch on your side as the poet. Good work...There's a bit of asynchronicity with your use of repetition, check on that too.