Words can swarm and leave the children dry
The temperature's sleeve is an ancient goodbye
The clock's blinking backwards reflecting her crimes
Because the weight of a soldier kneeled into time
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Mothers raise sons and lose them in war. The clock outlives us all. I like your poem. There are many allusions stirred up by it for the reader to contemplate. Well done.
Here I go again. But I think you're tough enough to take it. I sort of get the idea of what you're driving at, but in my mnd, the thoughts are a little obtuse and hard to reach because many of the words do not have enough of a relation to their context. On the other hand, I say it's a good try. : Let me know if I have to expand my meaning. And I really don't think I have all the answers.