I’m the tree on the battlefield – a pitiful sight
I watch as the bullets fly to left and to right
I’m the tree that’s watched blood flow from every man’s heart
I’m the tree on the battlefield, half blown apart.
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I usually don't read rhyme but this poem is a fine accomplishment of rhyme that uses imagery to its advantage. Great poem. Title works as well.
The half blown tree would have said the same thing what Lucy says in this poem, had it been given a mouth to speak. A wonderful imagination to link a soldier with a blown out tree in the battle field. This should be an eye opener to the war mongers.
Tank you Jon, The refrain is there, for me, saying that the tree's still there, the war has gone, not a grautuitous repetition, just a statement really. Glad you liked it.
I think it's all been said already, but I loved this. What makes it special for me is the way that Nature's impassiveness is used to pull at the heart strings. I DID like the refrain, too, by the way... Jon.
I have to agree with Mary, this is outstanding. I think you have picked the correct structure (traditonalist) to put across your point of view. I cannot imagine this in any other way. Unlike Owen and Sassoon, for example, you write from a distance and this is a very brave thing to do. However the theme (like those of the great war poets) remains timeless. That you have avoided the cliche of the pointlessness of WW1 does you enormous credit. Denis Joe
Oh my gosh Lucy! This is such a touching poem. I have never thought from this perspective. How beautifully sad you've managed to capture the pain that is felt from war at all angles. Great poem. Sincerely, mary
As I love trees Lucy, I was hard put to keep a tear dropping over this one. I thought it was a lovely poem and cleverly thought out. Sincerely Ernestine Northover
I like the perspective of this poem. I don't know if anyone has assumed the persona of a tree during war but i like how you used it. The images are strong though i was worried about the emphasis being placed very strongly on the Englishman; though i guess that is just natural and i shouldn't impose my own fear of nationalism on fine poetry. I don't like the refrain, however. It seems a bit facile and, although i am not a fan of refrains admittedly, i think the stanza before was the best yet and would have been an excellent placed to end. That is just my personal opinion though.
Really great poem, trees have borne witness to the worst of humanity's endeavors.