Battle Poem by Tiff Murphy

Backed against the wall is how i feel,
Like a lion without the strength to fight anymore,
Heads bowed low while the tears stream down my face,
As the knife sinks in one more time i can barely feel the burn,
My eyes are blurred,
Drowning but no one reaches out their hand,
I’m stuck in this place that will never be my home,
I’m not wanted here nor do i wish to be,
Why can't I find any peace?
I miss all the things that used to be,
There weren't many fights,
Everything always turned out alright,
But here I feel like I can't even breathe,
The sobs keep rolling out,
Where did I lose control?
When did I lose it all?
Sometimes everything’s not black and white,
Right or wrong,
I’m not even sure anymore,
I just know that the blade helps me to feel,
The slashes never seem so bad,
So why does everyone care for appearance sake,
Are they that afraid of what people will think?
Will they know that this so called family is far from perfect?
I was a mistake,
That much is obvious,
If I wasn't born this hatred and anger wouldn't exist,
No more pain or sorrow to put up with,
I try to stand proud and never let them bring me down but I’m to my breaking point now,
They expect me to just be who they want me to be but I can't let myself down,
I vowed to never be the person that gives up easily,
I can't raise a white flag,
I watched her fall,
Her spirit was lost in the battle,
I have to do this for the both of us,
To show her how strong she could be,
I’ll crawl up off this floor and dust myself off,
Because there’s always more fights another day,
I have to prepare and try to make myself strong,
The battle will begin again,
Us versus them,
And I refuse to let them win,
Beaten, battered or bruised,
I will not let my soul die.