An Everlasting Love Comments

nicely penned loving lines...very emotive cheers

i like the way you presented love in a new light gives a lot to ponder on great poem

this is a great poem! it was written beautifully

see what love can do? ..it's a delicate feeling..grace

Indeed, we are all fools without love..........beautifuly written..

A very lovely piece...10

Aw! It is quite a beautiful poem +10

It is what your heart speaks, and very well expressed.

I enjoy this poem delicate heart, it has already been critiqued enough. They have shown you were it could be even better. So as It is, It is a good read for me! Thanks for the invite and I will be looking for more of your work.

i must agree with uilliam, because i also spotted the change from 'her' to 'him' all in all it is a good write.

There's a lot more rhythm and simplicity to this one. I like it. You've improved with this poem. However, if you allow me to show you where you made a few slight errors. I think this is how it should be written: 'I gazed in wonder at the sky. Staring, thinking, saying why Does the space reflect her eyes? For the stars have many ties. Belong to her entity until she dies. What makes one watch the sky? 'Tis her love. For her I would die. Only to lie. In her sigh. Her love, it makes me but insane. Walking, running in the torrential rain. I guess her flames are like a fire. Brace my heart by a tight wire. Without her invigorating fuel. I am nothing more than a fool.' 'Cos' would be better as 'for'. In the 7th line, 'him' should be 'her', if you are still addressing the sky. Seeing as you've personified the sky as 'her', it would be a mistake to change it to a 'him.' The last line didn't make much sense, so I changed it to 'I am nothing more than a fool.' With time, your grammar will improve and your poetry will inevitably improve as well. I see promise in your work.

this is a great poem it has a sweet feeling to it

i liked the rhyme and the soft feelings associated with the poem good work should in the 6th line watches be watch

A tender poem from a delicate heart...............Good Write..............

Great sensitivity. A lovely read. Best regards, Trade.

Loving lines, your poems remind me of works ive come across before......you've done well here

This is well written….I love the passion that it has…. Keep on writing

simple and touching lines......... beautifully penned. mine 10.......

its great i really like it thank you for sharing

do not think the fool in me is alone on me, in me the fool looks in on you from time to time...iip..fools love, does it differ from pyarite...? ..nine thoughts from this visit me..