An Ambivalent Independence Poem by Windsor Guadalupe Jr

Have I lost my mind, darling
Take me on a cruise, let's meander around the city
Like your lost childhood, we would recover them
With such desire that you sing about like an anthem.

Have I forgotten where my heart is, darling
You tell me of an allegory so genuine that it glints
Like an emerald, or a diamond that I appraise with subtle hints
That you, among the jewels, are the most precious of all.

So tell me with your eager eyes,
That open up like windows in the hazy summer sky,
What do you feel when the morose wind sets me in a trance,
Where I lose equilibrium, and I assume a frail stance?

Would you help me, would you say something?
Something that you have been reluctant to say?
Such as, 'I think we're better off this way.'
You have adorned me with a sky so austere in a shade of grey.

Would you sing to me, in my sleep?
A symphony so serene that it assumes the sound of a river?
Or a nuisance that halts what senescence flows as I stagger
With such lines that transforms into a fan of daggers!

If I am somber in my sleep,
Would you hold my hand, though unnoticed?
And utter such words as though my lips were kissed
By your lips slightly parted, but with a desire so unwanted

That it almost tells the truthfulness in a lie,
Whistling like the breeze in a lonesome troubled sky
Encroaching upon silken skin like thorns upon vines
Is the feigned response of your faintly rehearsed lines

In the passing of your reflection on the still waters,
What glow should my eyes possess amid the clamors?
Shall I occupy my eyes with the glinting glamour of chandeliers?
Or the soliloquy of the allegories behind tears?

What of it, should I feel, should I say?
As if, my heart caught in a turmoil of a turbulent fray
How should I flee, should I walk with my knees folded
Like arms clasped in the tight grips of a feeling absconded

That it does not show the decency that such love speaks of
Only in a dream, or a lack thereof
If you must, then should you direct me to a place,
Where I would revel in such loneliness that I do not need you beside me?