Alcohol Anonymous Poem by Lee Fones

got a bit of a problem (slurp)
yes I do like me drinks (burp)
it makes me hobble (slurp)
and breath it stinks (burp)

sometimes squabble (slurp)
Because I can't think (burp)
now I'm jobless (slurp)
thanks to D-wink (burp)

booked at alcohol anonymous
although had to tell my name!
thought I'm a hippopotamus
told them my nickname

sitting down around a table
everyone looked depressed
located a piece of flex cable
just cause I was stressed

not knowing what to do with it
asked if we'd all like a drink
they took the flex with grit
then filled this thing within, sink

a very funny contraption
they called it a kettle
looked like Anglo-Saxon
they said it was all metal

I'm so used to drinking
out of a glass or bottle
it seriously got me thinking
alcohol anonymous is awful

no more alcohol anonymous for me (burp)
now I feel so free (slurp)
sure somethings in this tea (burp)
smelt like just like whiskey (slurp)

so long alcohol anonymous slurp burp