African Rhythms Comments

Nice, very nice. It seems I was seeing all what you were describing.

Tan, I don't do drugs, but I swear that awesome vivid imagery was like listening to Pink Floyd and being bathed in their imagery. And I'm really good with visualizing. So that's a huge compliment to you!

Really adventure in Africa. Nicely written.

A beautiful kaleidoscope of images, many gems set in a stirring rhythm. Your best that I've read and it will be in my favourites' list too. I feel I shall read it many times over, Tan.

I absolutely love the imagery in this poem! It makes me think of oil paint straight from the tube: vibrant, thick and glossy. It's a mere description of a scene, without a feeling attached to it, but it's very powerful. I wish I could see it with my eyes instead of my brain! You have rare skills in creating pictures... Excellent.

Tan, I would echo what John has just said. You have rich imagery in you poems which you told me were written when you were 17. It is time to use those skills to write poems with more than just imagery. Raynette

Much imagery - indeed, very rich - but I find little meaning. You obviously, at this age, had command of an important element in shaping poetry, but this element cannot stand by itself. I suspect you've matured. Unkill your muse. When I was 25, after 10 years of writing poetry, I wrote a poem that was gorgeous, which, upon my careful examination, said nothing at all. I right then quit writing poetry for 12 years, and my later work was the better for it. I spent those 12 years writing technical articles for Hot Rod Magazine, for audiences of a million readers at a time, and the experience of writing exactly, to exact points, informed my later, creative work. Your 19-year-old self needed a similar discipline. If you acquired it, start writing again.

Your've captured strong images here Tan. Much enjoyed.

Amazing feel! ! I felt as if I was there experiencing it....you have a way with words.

Fantastic imagery. Really enjoyed the colour and life of it. Keep writing, Tan. Eve x

I totally agree with Joy and Max. A stunning poem, full of colour and wonder and perfect technique. You are extremely talented as a poet, so do please write some new ones.

Absolutely beautiful. I enjoyed your technique and the language that was used as well as the meter. One of the best things I've read here for a while. Well Done! ! !

this is sunningly beautiful language. I especially love the 'pheonix rising' lines, and the legitimate use of the beautiful word 'basilisk'. I'll make a note to read more of yours.