A Mythical Mish Mash Poem by Mary Champion

Noah was a conspiracy theorist -
got it into his head that God,
was some kind of fanatical terrorist
who had a hand-picked killer squad

of angels and demons and devils on hand
to eradicate humankind,
to wipe everyone from the face of the land.
And though all his neighbours were blind

to the dire peril, as Noah perceived it,
he set about building a boat.
He had read all the runes and believed it
was his only chance to promote

survival for him and his family too.
How the townsfolk scorned his project
as, cubit by cubit, his strange vessel grew.
And it soon became the object

of fascination to the popular press,
who recorded ev'ry detail
of Noah's wild deluded nervousness -
predicting the venture would fail.

But, just as the last rivet was driven in,
the clouds gathered and the rains came.
Day after dank day the rain kept on falling
night after night it was the same.

 
Soon the whole world was ten feet under water
as the melting icecaps joined in.
Storm force winds roared in from every quarter.
Noah gathered his precious kin.

He welcomed all the im-paired people aboard,
then soothed and re-paired their sad hearts.
But all the smart arses who'd jeered and ignored
him were fed to the circling sharks.

With all of the chosen secured, he set sail
where the end of the rainbow lies,
where you'll find crocks of gold and the holy grail
and nobody ever dies.

The cowardly lions will find their valour,
men of mettle will learn to feel,
the ragged losers will get a lot smarter,
and all will have a fairer deal.

When the clouds have cleared and the Sun's shining bright,
Noah will trumpet, triumphant -
'Even the paranoid can sometimes be right.
From now on - you trust my judgement.'