6943 Comments

A ribbon of fire is laid on the platform as the train rolls ominously through, good image for ur reader. I like how you set the stage then get to it...like a movie. good job. *Purkey Girl*

Wow....absolutely EXCELLENT...how sad and deep, im assuming this train met a fire of some kind? the kissing lines in the first verse were so vivid yet so abstract. You have skill my friend

nice piece- keep writing :)

A wonderfully vivid portrait, Bill. Fx

Wow your good! An artist that uses words instead of paint.

Lovely, ever since I read William Carlos William's Pictures poems..I wanted to write something similar. Now I want to do that again, after your inspiring poem. Thank you for sharing.